Sunday, October 25, 2009

God Damn It, Gurl

Anyone who knows me knows that I pretty much have a ladyboner for Fiona Apple, because her music is fkng awesome. But GIRL WHAT IS WITH THE ENSEMBBBBBBBBB? Good God Jesus, I don't even know where to begin. Let's start with the SHOES. WHATTTTTTTTTTTTT. I'm sorry, are you an 86-year-old named Millie? No, so stop selecting footwear like one. And what on god's green earth told you to wear those shoes with THOSE TIGHTS with that dress? And then throw on a bra that ruins the silhouette of your dress and is also totally the wrong color? This hurts me. This hurts me in my heart. Is that a purse, or a giant velvet pouch for your silver??? I am literally pained by your presentation - DIY hair & makeup and your walking Vincent Van Gogh self portrait boyfie included*. Gurl, call me!!! Shit.

* Jonathan Ames, but isn't it more fun my way?

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